Spoony the Pussy One: Life is in the Render Queue

[VoiceOfReasonPast]

It was Fallon actually. And e-celebs are guests on shows all the time but they have to be S-class e-celebs or someone from a funny viral video that the facebook moms shared around. These are people with 1 million+ subs and big view counts in the hundreds of thousands per video. Spoony is literally 10% of their size at his peak.

They have to be e-celebs on Youtube. Did normies ever knew of Blip?

[Vaporwear]

TL;DR just because Spoony made $2000 in a year for streaming, doesn't mean he'd be making $60,000 a year if he made proper videos again

Doesn't mean he wouldn't, either. If he can make that much as an ass just imagine what he would make by streaming regularly. Razorfist makes a fortune doing a four-hour stream once a week, and that grifter Nerdrotic has a dude who drops $600 superchats. Life isn't fair, and an asshole like Spoony could easily live on easy mode if he wanted to.

This is all fantasy land nonsense. Sure, if Noah Antwhiler stopped being a completely narcissistic asshole who expects people to just give him money for no reason and decided to actually start working again, and cut his hair and started taking daily showers and started eating better and routinely interacted with people and also stopped abusing alcohol/drugs while also exercising at least a little bit every week, then sure, he MIGHT be able to make a comeback and make a lot of money.

But that’s a huge fucking if. And even then he’s past his prime. I can name a good dozen people on youtube that do the same thing that Antwhiler used to do and do it better while also being more popular and more consistent than Antwhiler ever was. He had his time in the sunlight, he was making 5,000 a month off Patreon alone, he had every chance to continue making that kind of money so he could pay his mortgage, keep his gold digger girlfriend happy, used his e-fame to transition into the type of projects he really wanted to make, and potentially make that Spoonyone movie like he promised.

Hell, for the movie he could’ve just outsourced most of the work to Brad Jones and CA, he could’ve opened up a kickstarter and just asked for $50,000 and I guarantee you he’d have made that goal. He could’ve made a piece of shit movie where all he had to do was act in it while Jones did the directing and Doge Walker wrote the script. It would’ve sucked but who cares? The movie would’ve been finished in under a year and then he could’ve had Jones distribute it on DVD like how Jones does with his own shitty films.

But that’s the thing, Antwhiler’s too much of a lazy, narcissistic asshole to have thought of any of that. He couldn’t possibly fathom the idea of asking for help on something that would’ve needed an entire crew to get finished. He also had too much of a fragile ego to consider cancelling the idea. He couldn’t make the movie but his fragile ego wouldn’t allow him to admit that to his fans, so he doubled down on that DOA project.

The Spoony Movie is a perfect example of why Antwhiler failed and why he’ll never come back. Here he’s presented with a problem: he hit a Patreon goal that he knows he can’t pull off. He has two good options: get his shit together and put in the work to actually make the film, or issue a public statement where he apologizes and tells his fans he can’t make the film. Both options are impossible for Antwhiler: he’s too much of a narcissist to admit that he fucked up, so he can’t cancel the movie, but he’s too lazy and egotistical to actually work on a movie or ask for help from the CA people. So instead he doubles down on the film while doing absolutely nothing, occasionally makes a joke about the film, and eventually stops mentioning it altogether. That’s how Spoony handles every problem that comes his way, rinse and repeat. That’s why he lost his house, that’s why April left him, that’s why he has no money, that’s why he stopped making reviews, that’s why he gets angry whenever anyone gives him advice on his streams or on Twitter, and that’s why he’s God knows where now, a failure of a person who had his chance at success but blew it.

Antwhiler is done, and nothing short of a complete reinvention of his entire personality will fix that.

[Vaporwear]

That most esteemed Mashable Award might've already heralded in the end times for him. Just like he got the award thanks to his legion of tard fans, he probably expected them to open Colbert's door for him.

Noah never applied anywhere though. He just expected a fantastic life and loyal fans without the work. He easily could have applied to a local radio show and be a talk radio show host. The use that as experience for hosting a radio show, in say a bigger market. Then work your way from there. Maybe you end up nowhere, or you could be the host of an actual tv show?

Applying to a local radio show is out of the question for Antwhiler. First of all, he’d have to actually prove that he’d be a good host. But Antwhiler’s a lazy narcissist, he doesn’t believe in having to audition, he’d expect just to be handed the job because he’s Noah Antwhiler, and Noah Antwhiler just deserves things because he’s Noah Antwhiler. And then he’d get fired anyway because his narcissism would lead him to treat his coworkers like shit, because he’s so much better than them, and if he wants to tell rape jokes to his female co-workers that’s fine, because Noah Antwhiler gets to say whatever he wants to whomever, just because he’s Noah Antwhiler.

[Guest]

The Spoony Movie is a perfect example of why Antwhiler failed and why he’ll never come back. Here he’s presented with a problem: he hit a Patreon goal that he knows he can’t pull off. He has two good options: get his shit together and put in the work to actually make the film, or issue a public statement where he apologizes but tells his fans he can’t make the film. Both options are impossible for Antwhiler: he’s too much of a narcissist to admit that he fucked up, so he can’t cancel the movie, but he’s too lazy and egotistical to actually work on a movie or ask for help from the CA people.

You're right he's a narccistic asshole, but your'e off on his rationale for not making the movie. Narcs like him deep down hate themselves and have to prop up themselves via constant sources of praise. He immediately pictured the end-product, and for all his dreams, he does not feel like he could make a film that wouldn't result in a huge backlash. He immediately pictured bad reviews, fans getting mad at him. So he froze like a deer in the headlights.

[Guest]

Fuck off faggot, he had no intention of ever making a movie.

[Complicity]

Applying to a local radio show is out of the question for Antwhiler. First of all, he’d have to actually prove that he’d be a good host. But Antwhiler’s a lazy narcissist, he doesn’t believe in having to audition, he’d expect just to be handed the job because he’s Noah Antwhiler, and Noah Antwhiler just deserves things because he’s Noah Antwhiler. And then he’d get fired anyway because his narcissism would lead him to treat his coworkers like shit, because he’s so much better than them, and if he wants to tell rape jokes to his female co-workers that’s fine, because his female co-workers are narcs more dangerous than him, and they destroyed lives and reputations for re-tweets.

The rest is completely valid though.
The number of well meaning, mentally sane people associated with CA can literally be counted on the fingers of an amputee.
JewWario was the perfect representation of that site:
A bunch of disgusting, mentally disturbed pieces of shit who won't hesitate an instant to stuck a knife between your shoulder blades for the most insignificant personal gain, while pretending to be friendly, down to earth and wholesome.
The personification of every negative stereotype about nerds and geeks.

You're right he's a narccistic asshole, but your'e off on his rationale for not making the movie. Narcs like him deep down hate themselves and have to prop up themselves via constant sources of praise. He immediately pictured the end-product, and for all his dreams, he does not feel like he could make a film that wouldn't result in a huge backlash. He immediately pictured bad reviews, fans getting mad at him. So he froze like a deer in the headlights.

Nah he always knew that making a movie would have been impossible.
And, like Vapor said, he was too much of a prick to admit it was a stupid idea and apologize to the peasants.
So he started making up one excuse after the other.
I believe muh depression was completely invented, just like all the other diseases he claimed.
He proved to be a textbook narc, and the way he tweets may suggest that he's bipolar. That's it.

[Guest]

Spoonster cameoed on some random newscast.

https://youtu.be/0QOz1HPOrIs?t=256

Speaking of random cameos

[Kugelfisch]

So that's what James has time for, huh?

[Complicity]

Jamesy's entire job consists in cameo appearances, especially on his channel.

[Vaporwear]

Applying to a local radio show is out of the question for Antwhiler. First of all, he’d have to actually prove that he’d be a good host. But Antwhiler’s a lazy narcissist, he doesn’t believe in having to audition, he’d expect just to be handed the job because he’s Noah Antwhiler, and Noah Antwhiler just deserves things because he’s Noah Antwhiler. And then he’d get fired anyway because his narcissism would lead him to treat his coworkers like shit, because he’s so much better than them, and if he wants to tell rape jokes to his female co-workers that’s fine, because his female co-workers are narcs more dangerous than him, and they destroyed lives and reputations for re-tweets.

The rest is completely valid though.
The number of well meaning, mentally sane people associated with CA can literally be counted on the fingers of an amputee.
JewWario was the perfect representation of that site:
A bunch of disgusting, mentally disturbed pieces of shit who won't hesitate an instant to stuck a knife between your shoulder blades for the most insignificant personal gain, while pretending to be friendly, down to earth and wholesome.
The personification of every negative stereotype about nerds and geeks.

You're right he's a narccistic asshole, but your'e off on his rationale for not making the movie. Narcs like him deep down hate themselves and have to prop up themselves via constant sources of praise. He immediately pictured the end-product, and for all his dreams, he does not feel like he could make a film that wouldn't result in a huge backlash. He immediately pictured bad reviews, fans getting mad at him. So he froze like a deer in the headlights.

Nah he always knew that making a movie would have been impossible.
And, like Vapor said, he was too much of a prick to admit it was a stupid idea and apologize to the peasants.
So he started making up one excuse after the other.
I believe muh depression was completely invented, just like all the other diseases he claimed.
He proved to be a textbook narc, and the way he tweets may suggest that he's bipolar. That's it.

I’m just saying, rape jokes at a place of work are typically looked down upon. Source: me, who has a job and works with co-workers, like most people.

I’m also not saying that the CA people were mentally stable, talented, or could even be considered good people. We all know those psychos were back-stabbing femi-nazi hypocrites who touted shit like feminism but were perfectly OK with concealing rapes. What I’m saying is in regards to shitting out a d-grade, cheap piece of shit movie, that they would’ve been Antwhiler’s best bet to get that stupid film done. And they would’ve done it too, even after that whole radiator rape tweet meltdown.

And that’s always been Noah Antwhiler, he’s always had every advantage in the world made available to him and people have been handing him free shit all his life or offering to help him so he could be successful, but instead his laziness, narcissism, and massive ego always led him to reject any help or to avoid taking advantage of the many opportunities that popped up throughout his life. Antwhiler tried so hard to portray his life as difficult and painful but he’s never had a difficult life, all his failures are self-inflicted wounds that any one else could’ve easily avoided. He chose to simply collapse in the face of no actual adversity, which makes him far more interesting than the ex-CA INs who tried their best and failed or the dudes that are still trying to succeed.

Also I don’t think he’s bipolar. The dude self-diagnosed himself with a lot of unverified bullshit like bronchitis, cardiomegaly, sleep apnea, shingles, MRSA, night terrors, etc., and I’ve never seen any evidence that suggested that he had any of that stuff, bipolar disorder included. Miles never mentioned it, his family never mentioned it, his ex-girlfriends never mentioned it, he never presented any evidence that a doctor diagnosed him with it, and quite frankly his behavior doesn’t appear to be reminiscent of bipolar disorder if we go by the textbook definition of it. If he has bipolar disorder then it was undiagnosed ever since he was a teenager because even going back that far he sounded like a contemptible piece of shit who needed a swift kick in the ass if we’re to go by his old blogs and stories.