Dead Horse Interchange

Kugelfisch wrote: ↑

Thu Jun 08, 2017 9:12 pm

Poonoo wrote: ↑

Sat Jun 03, 2017 11:44 pm

Charlar wrote: ↑

Sat Jun 03, 2017 5:41 pm

Hypothetical, would the prequels be any better if someone else directed them?

Yes, because as Plinkett pointed out George directed them in a very lazy way with that 2 shot bullshit. The acting wouldn't have been as stiff and wooden, and it would have looked better visually at least.

Funnily enough, Lucas was 1000% percent right when he said that they have to make Jar Jar work because he's "the key to all of this". If you had asked people what the worst thing about Episode I was shortly after it came out they would've said "Jar Jar". He was the biggest complaint by far.
Now I'd say it's just how fucking boring the movie is and all of the writing. All of it.

The writing is the #1 problem I'd point to with all of the prequels. It's either boring as fucking shit or some new form of hilariously awful maymay.

Mummy was pretty good, washed the tasted of WW out of my mouth.

Pros:
*sexiest Mummy ever. Like damn.
*blonde lead was cute
*Mummies were kind of creepy, lots of action.

Cons:
*no sex
*no swearing
*very little violence
*it's clearly fucking made for CHINA.

Doesn't China have a "No undead allowed" law in place? Because that is disrespectufl towards their ancestors or something?

Rushy wrote: ↑

Thu Jun 08, 2017 9:56 pm

I always thought the whole "Jar Jar is the key to all of this" was just referring to the CGI.

Jar-Jar put Palpatine in power. Jar-Jar is the puppet master. He is Darth Jar.

Technically she's not dead. She's just frozen in mercury or some goofy shit. And the Mummies she makes in the movie are more like ugly slaves, I guess.

Anyway, it's being savaged by critics and looks like a bomb. So Universal might be resetting their stupid-ass monster universe yet again.

VoiceOfReasonPast wrote: ↑

Fri Jun 09, 2017 3:51 pm

Doesn't China have a "No undead allowed" law in place? Because that is disrespectufl towards their ancestors or something?

If you've got enough money and enough connections you can usually bypass some of the more ridiculous Chinese censorship laws, like that one

Mr. Saoirse Ronan wrote: ↑

Fri Jun 09, 2017 1:55 pm

• sexiest Mummy ever. Like damn.

Too much jaw for my taste

Rushy wrote: ↑

Thu Jun 08, 2017 9:56 pm

I always thought the whole "Jar Jar is the key to all of this" was just referring to the CGI.

They way I understand it, Lukas wanted, for once, to predict correctly what character people are going to like. He missed out hard on making Boba Fett a bigger deal in the original series because he didn't think people would be so much into some rando headhunter that's pretty lame. So he made sure to have him be a big deal in the prequels.

But what he wanted was to create a character like that purposefully to not just profit in hindsight but right when the movie is current. He clearly planned for Jar Jar to be the one character people would absolutely love. He didn't want to miss the train this time around! People are going to love Jar Jar and they will be delighted to see that he's not just some throwaway, accidental hit but actually vital to the story.

Then he went ahead and completely fucking missed the train anyway by betting on the false horse. People hated Jar Jar, who had now to be written out of the story as much as possible. Meanwhile, the character people actually thought was super rad, Darth Maul, was a throwaway character killed off in the movie with no chance of making him a bigger deal. He had the same shit happen to him as it did with Boba Fett.
If he hadn't given away the franchise he would've found a way to bring Maul back and have him be a big deal. I guarantee it.

He already returned in Clone Wars and Rebels.

And holy shit Phasma is FemJarJar. Except they didn't give her a big role just in case.

I watched the 1933 King Kong for the first time. Great special effects work, but I'm not a big monster movie fan so I thought the story was kind of meh.

Also, Darth Maul coming back was as jump the shark as it gets. Not every Sith needs to have some epic storyline, can't he just be some evil douche? I thought that's why people loved him, not because of weird Dathomir magic shit.

It was amazing, there was SO much merchandising, tie-ins, and hype around this movie in the US.

Lucas wisely released the merch BEFORE the movie came out. But afterwords... store shelves were just filled with the Jar Jar crap that nobody wanted. Lucas promised these licensors that Jar Jar was gonna be the next big craze.
I remember there was one company that made these popular, high-end alarm clocks with little animatronic figures. They had one model with the droids, and another with Vader. Then they bet everything on Jar Jar. Nobody wanted to buy the expensive Dancin' Jar Jar alarm clock. I heard that the business went under due to this.

Even when the store put this garbage on clearance, nobody would buy them. I remember the local Toys R Us eventually moved them to a rack outside. It was like, "Please steal this." You couldn't give it away.

I like to imagine that the toys all got shipped over to some 3rd world shithole, but they probably just got buried in a landfill somewhere. They won't bio-degrade, so archeologists thousands of years from now will find it and claim it was some some kind of idol.